THE BEAUTY IN IMPERFECTIONS

When I first found out I was having surgery, one thought that came to mind was ‘I wonder how big the scar will be?’. I assumed it would be this ittybitty incision, and that it would be easy to cover up but boy was I wrong. I woke up to find my entire stomach covered up in bandages and days later after the covering was removed, I realized how big of a scar I had. So apparent it ran down my entire stomach ending a few inches past my belly button. I was sad to say the least, but looking back at it now, I have no reason to feel ashamed. I’m proud of what it means. It means I survived something that would have certainly killed me, if it weren’t for the wonders of modern medicine, perseverance, and a whole heap of love and faith.






And now, 4 years later, I’m growing a tiny human being inside and it’s the most wonderful feeling in the world. I never thought I would get to experience this having come a long way with this battle. So now, instead of being ashamed of it, I’ve learned to embrace it. Embrace the fact that I had to fight through some bad days to earn the best days of my life. And with my due date just around the corner, I know the best days have yet to come! I thank my lucky stars that I beat cancer’s ass and I’m still standing here today to tell my story.

Special thanks to Andy Shepard for capturing these amazing photos.

31 WEEKS BUMP UPDATE

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How far along?: 31 weeks and 1 day
Total weight gain: 16 pounds total. I gained 3 more pounds since my last checkup on January 18, which puts me at 147 pounds.
How big is baby?: The size of a pineapple. Weighing in at about three-plus pounds and measuring about 16 inches long.
Sleep?: So far so good! I sleep best on my left side and wake up just once to use the restroom.
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Best moment this week?: Being told at our OB appointment today that baby is measuring right on track! Yay! Getting to read a bedtime story and feeling the baby kick right afterwards!
Worst moment this week?: Not fitting into anything cute. Feeling really fat instead of feeling preggo…thanks boobies…grrrr!
Movement?: Plenty! Baby moves around ALL of the time. It is the best feeling ever, and I find myself stopping everything to just really soak it in. Every movement, every little kick and hiccup, they tell me that everything is going to be okay.
Labor signs: Nope! Thankfully!
Food cravings?: Grapefruit, peanut butter sandwich, & ice honey green tea
Symptoms: A general ‘full’ feeling in my upper stomach. Low back pain, fatigue and shortness of breath has also gotten a lot worse as my lungs are all squished up now…ahh!
Stretch marks?: Belly is still stretch mark free
Belly button in or out?: Still an innie
What I miss: Being able to go bowling
What I’m looking forward to: If we’re having a little boy or  a little girl!!! I think there are so few genuine surprises left in life I couldn’t think of anything better than letting this baby be one of them. I can’t wait for Andre to be the one who reveals to me what we’ve had (as tears stream down his face)!

28 WEEKS BUMP UPDATE

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Hello, Third Trimester!!!

3 more months to go!

I’m ‘sorta kinda’ showing…if I wear really tight clothing, otherwise according to people I don’t even look pregnant….let alone be ‘only 28 weeks’ pregnant.

I had an OBGYN visit today as well as the big glucose test (which I passed..YAY!). We got to hear the baby’s heartbeat which was in the 150s.

I don’t have any weird cravings that most pregnant women talk about. I think it’s just their way of wanting to eat something pickled without feeling to guilty about eating it. The only maternity things that I’ve purchased are 2 pairs of Paige maternity jeans that I absolutely love!!! I wear them ALL the time.

Not only is the belly growing..but my boobs have become massive. And gross. And annoying. And FULL. And uncomfortable. I cannot stand to wear a regular bra for very long and I hate that sports bra gives me a uni-boob.

I have lower back pain and shoulder pain that easily goes away thanks to pregnancy massages! I still continue to take my prenatal pills that makes me feel nauseous but as long I take them before going to bed then it’s not so bad!

Absolutely LOVED the tumbling feelings in my belly. It’s weird and sometimes it hurts, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything. I also cannot seem to stop touching/rubbing my belly these days. I’m not sure what that’s all about, but it’s oddly soothing to me!

With 12 weeks to go:

  • I’ve gained 13 pounds which puts me at 144. I’ve read weight can either continue increasing by a pound a week, or slow down to stall out completely as you get closer to term, so will see how that goes!
  • No stretch marks (knock on wood). I don’t use any oil or cocoa butter.
  • I am tired. No matter how exhausted I am I cannot fall asleep before midnight. I’ll start dozing off sitting up multiple times throughout the day, but when I lay down in bed I just can’t fall asleep.
  • I walk. A lot. Everyday. To and from work so that’s has become my daily exercise.

TEA FOR TWO!!!

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This has to be one of the most fabulous, emotional, wonderful posts I have EVER written and I am SO happy to share this news with you.

I never thought this day would come…I have dreamed for years of being a mama … thought about how I would tell people … how I would feel … what kind of mom I would be … and here we are … Andre and I couldn’t be MORE STOKED to grow our little family!!

I am currently 22 weeks pregnant which translates to a little over 4 months! I feel GREAT and so far we are all very healthy and SO excited! We are going to keep the gender a surprise, so we don’t know if it’s a boy or a girl till April 2017!

Being pregnant has been the WEIRDEST thing I have ever experienced. Maybe I will call it beautiful once the baby is here but for now, it’s just WEIRD. I am literally growing a tiny person. I still can’t get over that.

I have put off this post and telling people for a while, mostly because … I wanted to make sure that I was doing good. Since dealing with cancer, surgeries, and routine scans I had to make sure that I was able to do this without any hiccups. Both my oncologist and OBGYN have been really AMAZING in answering all my questions relating to pregnancy, giving medical advice, and just overall being very supportive!
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Special thanks to my sidekick Nancy for dolling me, taking amazing photos, and sharing a delicious cup of tea with me!